Christmas bonding
by BlueDream1
Summary: It´s Christmas Eve and the losties are reflecting upon their previous Christmases and how it affected their lives. In doing that, their friendship becomes closer and closer...


For some reason, I fell into the Christmas mood already, although it´s around 30ºC here. Crazy, huh? But, what can I do? Christmas is my favorite time of year and right now I can´t help it but to listen x-mas songs. Anyway, this is just a little story I wrote this afternoon. It includes almost all characters and I like it because it explores bonds between them, wrapped into the magic of Christmas Eve. So, I hope there are others on this forum that like Christmas, too and that you´ll like this fic. Please, tell me what you think. Thanks…

_Author's Notes/Disclaimer:_ I don't own _Lost _or any of its characters. I just own my imagination and a Christmas spirit!

_**CHRISTMAS BONDING**_

It was night. The survivors were sitting around the fire, silently gazing into its sparkling flames. They were all very quiet; each of them lost in his/her thoughts. Golden traces of light could be seen reflecting on their faces, making the atmosphere even more intimate.

Kate was sitting at the beginning of the line; her back leaned against Jack´s chest and his hands resting on her stomach. It was strange how quick she got used to this position, to this intimacy. Jack and she have been a couple for almost a month now, and she liked the thought of having him close to her whenever she needed him.

She studied the faces of her friends, noticing the shadow of reminiscence that was mirroring in each and every eye. She knew what they were thinking about, ´cause she was thinking about the same thing. _Christmas_. This will be their first Christmas on the island. _First Christmas away from home_. Not that she did have any, though; but she missed the feeling of it. _The feeling of Christmas in the air_. _The smell of Christmas trees selling in the street. Chestnuts roasting on an open fire. The sparkling eyes of children as they press their little faces against the shop windows, taking in all the magic of this special holiday._ She smiled. She may not seem like, but she **_was_** a Christmas type. She liked all that magical atmosphere: shops decorated, streets illuminated, Santas singing…But, the thing she loved the most about Christmas was that at least on that one day in a year everyone seemed united and all the differences in the world seemed forgotten.

˝Jeez, how I miss Christmas…˝ whispered Hurley, more to himself than to make conversation.

It seemed that he formed into the words what everyone was feeling. They all bent down their heads, looking into the ground. No one seemed to be able to resist to this state of melancholic pensiveness. It was the night before Christmas and everyone was thinking about their dear ones which they might never see again. They missed family; they missed friends, presents, snow… _Snow._ It was strange how one little thing can miss you so much. On the island where reigns only summer, snow missed a lot, especially in this time of the year.

˝Where I was born…˝started Eko, causing everyone to raise their heads. ˝….parents didn´t have money to buy us presents for Christmas. They even didn´t have enough money to procure us food every day. ˝

He paused a little, obviously remembering the days of his childhood. No one spoke. Even Walt raised his look from the comic he´s been reading, interested in the man´s story. Before the crash here, he couldn´t have imagined life without radio, television, gameboy… Every Christmas morning, he would find his living room full of different kinds of presents: candies, toys, cd-s… And now, he was listening about the kids who barely had a piece of bred to eat.

˝And still, that was my favorite time of year. ˝Eko continued; his finger traveling across the old wooden stick. ˝My brother and I would wake up early in the morning, while our parents would still sleep; then run out to pick some flowers, so it could welcome them when they wake up… Then we would all go to church, to thank the Almighty for sending us his son. Later on, the neighbors would come to our house. Everyone would bring some food and then we would all have lunch together, thanking the God for giving us a chance to be together. After lunch, we kids would go play outside; while the women cleaned up the house. In the evening, everyone would gather in the house, singing Christmas songs and telling the stories of long time ago. ˝

He finished the story, returning to staring at the fire. For a few minutes everything was quiet; then Charlie spoke:

˝This time last year I was…I was on the bathroom floor. Drugged. Almost unconscious…˝he started, staring at his finger tapes that had ˝FATE˝ written over them. ˝What a great concert it was. _The Driveshaft Christmas Treat_. Thousands of people, screaming, singing… We really rocked that night… But when all of it finished…˝he said, looking at Claire who was holding Aaron in her lap. ˝…I realized that I had no one to come home to. No one to kiss goodnight. No one to share the happiness with… So I shared it with heroin. ˝

Claire put her hand on top of his; letting him know that now he has that person. He wrapped his fingers with hers.

˝I guess it´s my turn now. ˝started Claire shyly. ˝I don´t know if any of you knows it, but before the plane crashed, I planned to give the baby away. ˝

Everyone looked at her.

˝Yeah… Who would´ve thought it, right? As a matter of fact, I got on to that plane because I was going to LA to give my baby to a couple of strangers. Crazy, huh? And now…˝she paused, playing with baby´s fingers. ˝…now I can´t imagine my life without him. ˝

She started crying. Charlie put his arm around her back, pulling her into his hug.

˝Claire, it´s okay. It doesn´t matter anymore. He´s with you now. ˝

˝Thanks, Charlie. ˝she said, wiping away the tears.

Michael looked around. Everyone seemed to have their own story, whether it was sad or happy. _Well, maybe was time for him to tell his, also?_

˝I remember the Christmas when you were one year old. ˝he muttered, turning towards Walt. ˝It was the best Christmas of my life. Me and your mum got you dressed as a reindeer. We even drew you Rudolph´s nose with her lipstick.˝ He smiled at the memory. ˝We didn´t have so much money then, so we bought you just some water colors…When you left, I got that drawing framed and put it on the wall. It contained nothing, just few lines scratched on the white surface. But to me, it was worthier that Mona Lisa. ˝

He finished, watching his son in the eyes. The boy launched himself in his arms.

˝I love you, Dad. ˝

˝I love you too, son. ˝replied Michael, hugging him tightly.

˝I was born in a wealthy family. ˝started Jack, moving away lock of Kate´s hair from his cheek. ˝At Christmas, our house would look like from a cover of some magazine: big Christmas trees in every room, red and gold ribbons all over the house, bunch of presents under the tree… Everyone would´ve thought that we were a perfect American family. But it was all fake. True, I had everything I could possibly imagine, except the thing I wished the most. ˝he said, leaning his chin on Kate´s head. ˝My parents love. ˝

Kate looked up at him, seeing the sadness in his eyes. She lifted her hand and gently touched his cheek. He placed one small kiss on her elbow; then continued. ˝My father was a doctor, too. Chef of surgery, actually. He never was a family man. When I think about it, I can´t remember he was there at any Christmas. I would only see him in the evenings. He would say to me hello; then continued to his working room, closing the door behind him and abandoning himself in another drink. My mum was…She was too preoccupied with parties and social life to take care about her children… ˝he paused, lost in his thoughts. ˝Then again… I had some amazing nannies, who tried to compensate me the lack of my parents´ attention. ˝

Sawyer looked up. It seemed that neither Doc had only roses in his life, after all.

˝I was 9…˝he started.

Everyone turned their heads toward him, but he pretended not to notice. No one before expected him to talk about his life. And here he was.

˝My momma woke me up at dawn, saying it´s x-mas… I got down in the livin´ room, to find my dad hiding something behind his back. He moved away, revealing new blue bike, with bells and all… I was speechless. I wanted that bike for ages, but I knew we couldn´t afford it. He saw my surprise. And then he said to me: _James, I´ve been putting some money away for 6 months. And I bought it. I bought you a bike._ I hugged him. It was not the bike that mattered the most, but his act… I spent the whole day riding the bike. In the evening, my dad came to say me goodnight. He kissed me and said he loved me. I was never happier in my life… Three months later, he killed my mom and blew his head, too. ˝

Everyone stayed speechless. Sawyer raised his head to meet Kate´s eyes. He could see sadness and sorrow in them. He knew she understood him. After all, she was the first one he told about his parents. He also noticed Ana´s gaze. For the moment, he thought he saw tear in her eyes, but she pulled herself together quickly.

Ana returned her look from Sawyer to fire again. She didn´t know what to think anymore. Ever since they came to this camp, she was feeling like an outcast. The people here already got to know each other better and they seemed like some kind of family. Bernard and Libby befriended quickly with the others. Even Eko seemed to fit in. Only she wasn´t. Maybe it was because she was a cop: already used to be cold and suspicious. But this night, she realized that each one of them has his/her secrets, fears and desires; and, apparently, you felt better if you shared them with someone. So she decided to give it a try, too.

˝Back home, I was a cop. In academy, they trained you to be tough, to be strong, to hide your emotions. Well, I could do all of that. And I was good at it. Two years ago, I got pregnant. ˝she said.

Jack, Kate and Claire looked up. Sawyer did, too.

˝I planned to work until I was 5 months pregnant. Two weeks before I went on holidays, I got a call, saying that there was a house-breaking in one of the mansions in Upper High Street. I was the first one to arrive. I saw this kid, 16-17 years maybe, and I told him to put his hands up… He looked scared, telling me that I was making a mistake…that he was only a student and that he would show me his I.D. if I let him. I…I believe him… and I put my gun down. And then it happened. He pulled the gun out and before I could do anything, he started shooting. Shooting at me… Shooting at my baby. ˝

Ana Lucia stopped talking, bending her face into her hands. The faces of everyone revealed only shock. Claire looked at Aaron in her arms, pulling him closer in her hug. Jack and Kate just sat speechless. Sawyer reached with his arms and pulled Ana in his hug. She didn´t resist, but curled herself in his lap, her whole body shaking from pain.

˝Ssssssh…it´s okay. Just cry it out…It´ll feel better…˝he whispered, moving to and fro.

The silence fell again above the figures of survivors and the only sounds that could be heard were the crashing of the waves against the shore and silent rustling of the leaves. In spite the fact that they were all lost in their thoughts again, they never felt closer than on this special night. It was like the spirit of Christmas reached their island, too; and filled their hearts not with expensive gifts or empty phrases; but with the true meaning of Christmas: the one of being surrounded by the people who care about you. And they were.

Suddenly, the quiet was interrupted by silent tones of familiar melody. They raised their looks towards the direction of it. Charlie was sitting in the middle of the circle; the guitar in his hands. Closing his eyes, he started the song…

_Silent night  
Holy night  
All is calm  
All is bright  
'Round yon virgin Mother and Child  
Holy infant so tender and mild  
Sleep in heavenly peace  
Sleep in heavenly peace_

…………

Kate opened her eyes, letting them travel over the faces of her fellow survivors. _Walt was lying on the ground, holding his head in his dad´s lap; Rose and Bernard were right next to them, holding their hands; Hurley and Libby were giggling at some joke he just made… Then there were Locke and Eko, chatting silently; then Charlie, with Claire and the baby next to him; Ana, still sobbing in Sawyer´s arms._ Kate looked at Sawyer, happy to see worry and gentleness on his face. He deserved to be happy. ˝And so did Ana. ˝she thought. _She smiled at the sight of Jin gently caressing Sun´s stomach._ They´re gonna get the baby in less then a month and Kate wished them all the happiness in the world... And, finally there was she, still cuddled in Jack´s hug. They sat there in silence, enjoying in the soft tunes of Christmas brought to them. She felt him kissing the top of her head. She smiled.

˝Merry Christmas, baby. ˝he whispered.

˝Merry Christmas, Jack. ˝

_Silent night  
Holy night  
Son of God  
Oh love's pure light  
Radiant beams from  
Thy holy face  
With the dawn of redeeming grace   
Jesus Lord at thy birth  
Oh Jesus Lord at thy birth..._

……….

˝Maybe this Christmas isn´t so bad, after all. ˝Kate thought, throwing one last gaze around her friends before closing her eyes again.

_Sleep   
Sleep  
Sleep in heavenly peace  
Sleep in heavenly peace   
Sleep in heavenly peace  
Peace  
Sleep  
Sleep  
Sleep in heavenly peace_


End file.
